I want to start this blog post off by asking my readers to please bare with me. I usually prep and draft my posts but tonight I’m winging this and to top it all off – I’m doing so on my phone!
The last several years I have experienced an overwhelming amount of illness for my age. Currently 29, my health took a weird turn at age 24. Since then I have had a major hip/pelvis injury that occurred when I sat down on the toilet to pee – literally. My tendons and ligaments gave out and I lost all feeling to my legs. My doctor has had several theories but no definite answers as to how the injury occurred. Regardless, I was on bed rest for weeks and had to go through tons of physical therapy. During the time of my bed rest I also came down with shingles – and I truly feel for anyone who has to endure that painful, blistering rash. That same year I came down with shingles two more times. Several months after, I was hospitalized because my lungs weren’t functioning properly and being an asthmatic, it caused major problems. It took the pulmonary and immunology doctors two weeks to figure out that my body was having a severe reaction to allergens – I tested positive for 80/83 environmental allergens to be exact! During that time I also found that I was deathly allergic to bee venom. Yay for epinephrine!
Awhile later I came down with severe pain in my pelvis. I suffered through test after test and finally months later, after seeing several specialists – I learned that I had PID (pelvic inflammatory disease) a diagnosis that doctors kept putting on the back burner because it is generally caused by an std, which I repeatedly tested negative for and I wasn’t sexually active to boot. None the less, I was finally diagnosed and after a month of string antibiotic treatment, I recovered.
After that I came down with strep throat. Simple right? In fact this was a common illness for me for YEARS. Only this time the infection remained six months after it began and resulted in me having my tonsils removed at the age of 27.
Some time had passed and things were looking up, until I fell on black ice and broke my tail bone. This resulted in a lower back injury that would take several months to rear its ugly head. Every few months I have severe, debilitating pain in my lower spine that radiates down my hips, thighs, and into my knees – usually immobilizing me for days at a time.
I promise I have a point to sharing all of this information.
For a year (up until right before my wedding Sept 2016) I suffered spells of severe abdominal pain that landed me in the er every single time. In the beginning it was once every couple of months but toward the end it was occurring twice a week. I saw probably ten to fifteen different doctors and nobody could diagnose the cause of my pain. Until one doctor finally figured out that I had bile backing up into my liver and pancreatic fluid backing up into my pancreas. This resulted in another surgery called a sphincterotomy.
Six months later I had to have another surgery to remove kidney stones.
This past week my lungs took a fall. I has a severe asthma exacerbation. I have suffered from asthma since the age of 14. And I have gone through this a few times over the years but this time it was bad and I feared hospitalization. Within the course of four days I had been to the emergency room three times. I was loaded with steroids, antibiotics, believe syrup, and breathing treatments every 3 hours around the clock. Now I have gone two days without an asthma attack and an reducing my steroid intake and focusing on strengthening my lungs. Strengthening my lungs is by far the most difficult process of recovering from this because you literally have to get out and work your lungs while focusing on controlling your breathing. It’s painful. It’s scary. It’s necessary. I have been out of work for a week now and hope to return with my doctors approval this coming week.
Tonight though, I am facing another ailment that has yet to be officially diagnosed. I am sitting here writing this blog post and am hurting just because I’m sitting. Every few months my body flares up with pain that feels like I am literally bruised all over. It starts in my mid back, travels up through my shoulders, down my arms, into my chest, and occasionally like tonight – upwards into my face. Anything or anyone touching me (clothing included) is excruciating. Since doctors have not been able to diagnose this, treating it is pretty much impossible so I wait it out until it stops.
Many people don’t see or understand the amount of chronic pain that I am in because I continue my life day by day to the best of my ability. Which usually includes pushing through my very physical job in the healthcare field. Unless I am physically unable to move, I am at work. I am taking care of the home. I am caring for my family. I am still seeing through my responsibilities. If I didn’t – my life would be terrible.
The last “flare” that I described, I believe is due mostly to stress. Our brain and our bodies are connected in ways that many people cannot understand. I can assure all of you that if your mind is overloaded – you will feel it physically – and vice versa. That brings me to the point of this post.
Overall health over-ride.
I have talked many times about how I want to get into shape – and I really do, don’t we all at some point? I get so stressed sometimes about my body. I hate that I have “extra” under my chin, I hate that I have huge calves, I hate that I have rolls in my tummy area, I hate going to stores and seeing all of these things that I can’t wear because I am 260 pounds.
But you know what I hate the most? I hate that I hate my body and that isn’t physical – that’s mental.
One of my goals for this quarter is health related – weight loss related – I honestly cannot recall the exact goal at this time. But this past week my focus has changed. I don’t want to focus on losing weight, I don’t want to focus on toning my bod, and I don’t want to focus on everything I dislike when I look in the mirror.
What I want to focus on is feeling good – and right now I feel downright terrible.
Over the next several months I an going to research and search for ways to achieve this so that I can share it with the world. I know it’s going to take a lot and that’s okay. I can go to the gym and work out everyday, I can deprive myself of food that I enjoy because is fattening, I can take pills to cut he pounds and boost my energy – but it’s more than just a fix, it’s a lifestyle. I am determined to find a way to treat myself physically and mentally – improving my health all around so that I feel good mentally and physically.
I encourage anyone and everyone who is facing the same to join me on this journey. To follow my findings, to reach and share your own. And to be happy in doing so.
Until next time.